Know. God.

A couple days ago we had our monthly Day with the Lord. It is a time to rest and reflect in his presence and I always look forward to it! This time I felt unprepared somehow, like I wasn't mentally prepared or aware of what I wanted to learn or talk about with God. I felt like I was wandering aimlessly through what was supposed to be a very intentional, rewarding, mountain-top high kind of day.

I started talking to the Lord about this feeling of apathy and was quickly convicted. The more I journaled things out, the more I realized how much I was depending on feeling, on an emotional high, to affirm who God was to me and where I stood with him. I confessed that I had trained myself to seek some sort of emotional response on these set apart days. I expected tears or magically profound revelations. It had come to the point where I was valuing the highs of emotion over my actual relationship with God. Instead of just resting in and focusing on his character, I was demanding that he give me some kind of proof of his love for me.

He brought to mind Psalm 139, the "fearfully and wonderfully made" psalm. The second part of verse 14 especially struck me- "How wonderful are your works, my soul knows it very well." Here I was seeking an emotional sense of proof that God was with me when my very soul knows his goodness. When you know someone, really know them, you don't need constant reminders of their love for you. Why would you, you just know it?

It reminded me to dwell on all that I know to be true of God, the LORD I have put my faith in- that he is good, he is just, he is the Creator, he is merciful. The list goes on. As I did that, I heard him saying what he said in Psalm 46:10, "Be still and know that I am God."

Who needs fickle feeling when you can know in your very soul who the Lord is? I was relying on my feelings entirely too much and forgetting the beauty, the power and persistence of true faith.

I know feelings aren't evil, and the times in my walk that have triggered more emotional responses are special gifts from the Lord. But I also want to acknowledge my weakness in this area in relying so heavily on feeling for assurance of the Lord's character and goodness in my life. His works are wonderful, his generosity and love are beyond belief, and deep down in my soul I know this to be absolutely true.

the Stint Life through pictures

 

Just a few snapshots of the past couple of weeks

It's small, but it's home!



First day going to Waseda University as a team

Rainy day at Sky Tree, here you see the observation deck shrouded in fog

Beautifully dreary view from the mall at Sky Tree

Boys will be boys

Puffer fish hats and stuffed mushrooms? Why not!

Fun foggy view from our table at lunch

Yummy udon- perfect chilly day meal

Loyal tourists visiting Asakusa in the rain

With Ayuko after Ciel's performance of Swan Lake!

Tap Lovers and Ciel

With Taku after the performance

Bros  ^_^

International Day of Prayer

"Time spent in prayer will yield much more than that given to work.

Prayer alone gives work its worth and its success.

Prayer opens the way for God Himself to do His work in us and through us.

Let our chief work, as God's messengers, be intercession;

 in it we secure the presence and power of God to go with us."

Andrew Murray in The Ministry of Intercession: A plea for more prayer

 

 

Happy International Day of Prayer! Thankful God has called us to pray, has given us His Spirit within us to intercede on our behalf when we don't know what to pray for, and that His Son sits at His right hand and prays for us constantly.

 

As Murray also wrote, Lord, teach us to pray.